A Parking Spot for Mentality

By Christina Kim - July 26, 2016

It's been a month since my last post, I can't believe how much time has gone by either.
A lot has happened since, which I will update in my upcoming posts; though mostly revolve around health.

Experiences make us better along the way and it is inevitable to encounter a mix of good and bad incidents from time to time.
After all, we can't always be having a smooth journey; no, even nature has shown us through the ups and downs in the sea and even the weather (speaking of which, has been somewhat of a crazy roller coaster ride these days).

A recent experience inspired me to write about it, for it is something which I think is worth retelling and sharing in perspective.
It would not have been on my list of posts, and this was more of a spur of a moment kind of occurrence.

It was something which happened to me personally, last week.

I was on the hunt of a parking space along a row of shops, in an area which is usually very popular and known for its scarcity of parking spots particularly during peak hours of the day (and even week).

It was probably the third or fourth time I was making my rounds in the same area, and I was approaching this row of shops where cars were parked on both sides of the road.
This part of the road is also notorious for double parked cars with drivers waiting behind the wheels.

Perhaps it was my luck, or perhaps it was just that twist of fate for the part of the test, but at that moment, I spotted two gentlemen who were making their way towards their car and it was right at that spot where I was stopping.
Yes, I felt really lucky.

Instantly I turned on my right indicator to signal that I was waiting for the spot, even though the road was blocked anyway for any car to go through at that point.
Still, it was to notify any oncoming cars behind me that I was waiting.

The gentlemen got into their car while I waited patiently.

There was a car on my left, in parallel to my car, which was stationary though there was a driver in it.

What happened next was unexpected and totally took me by surprise, though not in a pleasant way, I must say.

The car on the left suddenly made a dash as it swerved in front of me and headed for the parking spot as the car was exiting that very space.
The driver positioned his car in a way to obstruct me and disabled me to move in any direction without knocking his car.

It was just like that, and unbelievably, he just drove into that parking spot.

I was left speechless, and stunned at what had just happened.

I could, of course, honk at him.
I could also roll down my window and tell him that I had been waiting.
I could even give him a piece of my mind for his behavior.

Guess what, I did nothing of that sort.

Instead, I drove away.

Maybe it was cowardly, but really, I did not think it was really worth getting into an argument over the parking spot.

First of all, it was obviously an intentional move by the other driver who had done it on purpose to just nab the parking spot.
If it was intentional, it means he had every intention to cause the damage and that only meant one thing; he did not care about the person (whoever it was) who was waiting.
He was probably even ready for a confrontation, which he would probably walk away from.

Secondly, it was rather disadvantageous for me since I was alone, and at the same time, there was no way I could hold the traffic for an argument with this man over a parking spot.

Thirdly, it was a parking spot and to get involved with a person like him over the spot was unnecessary.

Perhaps I sound like a coward, and this is not in any way a justification.

The above reasons are rather besides the point, though I saw the edge it gave that man which was the very reason that spurred his move in the first place.

He probably took advantage of all that facts to make his move, because he knew that it would be a victorious move for him in any way, or perhaps, he knew what he was in for.

However, what I saw was a far larger and more disturbing picture than just merely a man who shamelessly stole a parking spot from me.

Believe it or not, I was really not angry when that happened.

In fact, I was really stunned and then what came over me, honestly, was this incredible wave of sadness.
Yes, I felt this sudden strong wave of sadness which suddenly moved me for the incident showed me more than just a despicable act by another person.

It made me sad, because such person exists in our society.

Don't get me wrong, obviously I know there are bad people in our world and even in our very society.
We can't all be perfect, but we all hope for improvement, don't we, in our developing nation.

The reason which stunts a nation's growth is the mentality/mindset of the people.

This is a classic example of that, in reality.

I mean, it is really very low of someone to do something like that.
Even if it is just a parking spot.

This is also obviously a case of bullying, if you ask me.

The other disturbing thought that came to my mind was, "Was it because I was a lady?"

I mean, think about it, would he be so daring had it been another man, or a group of men in perhaps one of those modified types of cars blasting their speakers as they rumble past?

He might not.

That posed the question of WHY?

Gender discrimination and bullying continues to plague our modern society for many still continue to view women as the weaker sex and that they are easy prey for bullying, as in my own experience.

I felt discriminated, to be honest and that made me really sad.

I have often talked about the gender rights and mutual respect for both genders, and here is a classic example which just took place right with me in it.

It also goes to show that it was always easier said than done, and that when one is in the situation, it is no longer just a simple case where you could just draw the line.

That man obviously had every intention to bully me, and I felt I did nothing to fight back.

Then again, was it even worth the fight?

I am not one for shaming others on social media or in public, and this is not even the objective of my post, for I was merely sharing a personal experience and the way I viewed the whole incident, from my very own perspective.

I felt it was a worthy lesson to be learnt and showed me the harsh reality of how much work needed in the improvement of the overall nation's mindset to spur the growth and development in the country, and the world in general.

These are the thorns which need to be removed and these are the issues to look into to create a growing and prosperous nation; not just financially, but mentally and physically too.

I am not ashamed to share my story, but rather I think that the man who behaved in such an irresponsible manner should be more ashamed of himself.

It is also sad that as a woman, I felt helpless still, when it comes to situations like these where I had to consider my safety or even other factors before standing up to bullies like these.

Still, it was a good awakening to make us all know the level of discrimination and take a leaf from this that bullying is still very much at large and that there are various factors to consider as we prevent and stand up to bullying.

The bullying has got to stop; regardless of gender, social status, etc.

I found a better parking spot though, shortly after the bend, and I must thank the man, for indeed he did not just find a parking spot for himself, but he has created a parking spot for the need of mentality revolution.

I did not argue not because I was afraid.
I did not argue not because I gave in.
I did not argue not because he is a man and I am a woman.
I did not argue because it is not about the parking spot.
I did not argue because this is about the mentality.
I did not argue because I know he will not bother, for that is his mentality.
I did not argue because he definitely was expecting an argument and he was not even planning to give in.

Furthermore, will there be a result except a row which will only fall on deaf ears?

It is better to look at the bigger picture, and manage one's emotional intelligence than to get into a spat with a person who will stoop that low.

It was not just a parking spot in this case.

The incident found me a better parking spot; for the foundation of a good mentality and better emotional intelligence.

That, is far better than getting back like a madwoman.


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*Author's Note: 
This is not a sponsored/promotional post, and solely based on author's personal opinions and do not represent the general public. 
Experiences vary from one individual to another.
You do not have to agree with me.

Art Direction and Photography Styling by Me.
Photos/Videos all belong to me and are copyrighted.
Please kindly ask for permission if you need to use any of my images.




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